Exciting trip to London (OF DOOM) Pt2

Amazing-London-Trip Day 2 became eventful unreasonably early in the morning.  There we were, fast asleep in our fetching green duvets when someone ENTERS OUR ROOM !! Bear in mind this was at 20 to 1. Or 20 PAST 1. I forget. Let’s average it and say 1am. Anyway, as this was our first experience of a youth hostel, this was utterly terrifying for us. We both awoke, and in a fit of genius, silently hid ourselves in the covers. Maybe the girl would never know we were there...
Alas, that didn’t work.

The girl (who we later found out to be Danish) actually turned out to be nice. Rather than the murderer/rapist/thief we’d briefly assumed she was. We actually had a nice little chat with unnamed-Danish-girl in the morning. Although we never found out what she was called... I’ll just give her a generic Danish name. Like ... Yeah, I’ll google that.

“Mathilde”. So after our pleasant talk with Mathilde, we were on our way...
To Starbucks, a few doors down.  Where we enjoyed our London lattes and London yoghurt and a London muffin. LONDON.

After this, we noticed it had become MILDY SUNNY, so it was suddenly essential that I had sun cream RIGHT AWAY. I tend to burn up easily, like ... toast. Toast that my Dad’s made.
So with this newfound sense of urgency we RAN to the M & S next door (<3), unintentionally stumbled into our beloved bra section, felt up the mannequins for belly buttons, and purchased sun cream. Disaster averted.

As we’d inadvertently got up quite early, our plan to head straight to the V & A wasn’t going to work. So we happily skipped along a road until we found two farmers shouting outside Hamley’s front door. We come from the North of England, and therefore the countryside where we’re all farmers. We took slight offence to these frauds and their accents. It was wrong. ALL WRONG. 

Nevertheless, it made us go into Hamley’s where we were both shocked and amazed by the wonders inside. Shocked AND amazed.  There was a Harry Potter broomstick, cars that turned upside down, a Narnia themed staircase!! This was all slightly ruined by the presence of children. Many, many children.

When they eventually became too much for us, we headed for the V&A at last. It was filled with beautiful things. Like us!

Lol, jk.

After our brief spell there we trundled, yes, trundled over to the world famous  Harrods. I was convinced that I was going to be thrown out for wearing shorts, which is apparently against their dress code. But my blatant disregard for common decency went unnoticed. Our first stop was the food hall. We both purchased Woopie pies. RED VELVET woopie pies.
Now, armed with Harrods bags, we felt adequate enough to enter the rest of the shop without receiving scathing glares and ridicule. We took the opportunity to use the toilets, which even came with a special toilet lady who just stood there. 
Next, we wandered into the bra section. This just tends to happen. We were browsing average-looking-extraordinarily-priced pants when one of the assistants informed us of the incredible “3 for £29” deal.  We both made appreciative noises. Noises that said “Yes, that is a good deal and we shall take note of it”.  We left the shop without taking note of it.  

We took a BUS to our next destination, which according to our planning notebook was Buckingham palace. We got off next to the Ritz, walked up the street a little, crossed, and walked back on the other side. Just so we could walk next to the hotel building. 

We made it to Buckingham palace where we found one of the guards walking to the wall and back repeatedly. We initially thought this must be important, and mean that something significant was going to happen. It didn’t. Then we figured he just needed to walk so he didn’t pass out.
We were hoping the guards would change at some point. That would have been nice. Sadly not.
 The POLICE, however, did change for us. It was somewhat less impressive. They just walked to the gate and swapped over.
The most exciting moment of all was when the gate opened. We ran over to see what was happening. It seemed as though it was just an opportunity to take photos with the police officers.
But I wanted something more! So with all the courage I could muster, I approached one of the police officers and inquired “Er... Excuse me! Um, why are the gates open?”
“The countess of Wessex is coming in” the friendly man replied. “You don’t know who that is, do you?”
“No..”
“Is that an iPhone? Google her”
So we did. It was prince Edward’s wife. I think.
Over half an hour we waited for this so called countess. Our feet were slowly being crushed by our body mass, and twice that in shopping.
Eventually Jasmine decided we were going. As reluctant as I was, I followed.

We took a little tube trip to Camden Market which was amazing. I bought the craziest pair of pants with many bows on. I heard my dad find them in the washing yesterday, when he let a “Goodness me”.

After that, Jasmine dragged me around what must have been a million little book shops, proclaiming “I’m going to buy one before I leave”. She didn’t.

Eventually, it was time to go home. We boarded our train at St Pancreas armed with crisps and about 1kg of hummus. It was a nice journey. Oh, how we reminisced. We also listened to the conversation of the family next to us. That was fairly interesting.
I recommend it. Eavesdropping, I mean.
And London.

THE END.

Lots of love,
 Vicky xxxx

Exciting trip to London (OF DOOM) Pt1

As you've probably noticed, me and Vicky went to London on Friday. I AM HERE TO TELL YOU ABOUT THAT FRIDAY. Vicky's doing Saturday. THAT'S RIGHT. She's actually posting. I'm sure we're all looking forward to that.

So, on Friday I woke up at 6:45AM. I dressed. I facebooked. I blogged. All of the essential things. At 7:45AM I left the house with my parents calling after me to look both ways when I cross roads and to not get in cars with strangers. You probably think I'm joking.

If only you knew.

Met Vicky in town at 8AM, skipped down to the train station, bought our breakfast (I had a cheese and tomato muffin, Vicky had some sort of chocolate pastry twirl thing) and large coffees. Popped in to WHSmith for a notebook. Pretended we were on our way to a very important business meeting. THEN BOARDED THE TRAIN.

Vicky likes trains. She has a train fetish. She admits this freely... IKR. I like trains, but perhaps with less enthusiasm than Vicky, and this fondness dwindles as time on the train passes and I feel notably more ill. Though it has to be said, travel sickness and my insistent headaches are almost the only thing I can complain about as far as my physical health is concerned, so I'll accept it.

Despite the slight dizziness, it was FUN. We planned out the next two days in the notebook that we'd bought (with the help of the Guide to London), and Vicky drew a wonderful interpretation of Big Ben at the front. We discussed recent events in our lives, analysed Vicky's dream about Aarti's parents and Vicky decided that I "like the chase". LOLOLOL.Obv talking about Mario Kart. It's always more fun at the back (and no, that isn't because I'm just always losing anyway). You get all the good power ups.Then a nice man with a VERY quiet voice spoke to Vicky about UCL and medicine and stuff. We didn't get in to his car, don't worry, Mum.

Two and a bit hours later and the train pulled in to St PancrEAs, as I tend to call it. The sun was shining (scorching, burning, 'teva) and life was good. We weren't the only ones walking through the train station with hugs grins on our faces, no siree! EVERYONE IS HAPPY IN LONDON. I'm smiling just thinking about London. Can we go back? Like now? Yeah..? What? No? But. :C

We followed various signs down to the TUBE, where we bought two day tickets and worked out our route to OXFORD CIRCUS <33 After doing so, we got on one of many escalators leading down in to the deep depths of London (standing only on the right, obviously) and boarded our first tube. This in itself was exciting, but more than that was when we actually got OFF the tube (or 'train' as Londoners call it) and emerged at the heart of Oxford St, with the world of shopping directly in front of us.

We spent an indecent amount of time in Top Shop (bought some lovely things), popped in to a few other clothes shops, before taking a trip down to the lovely Covent Garden! Covent Garden is where you find all the statue guys, who paint themselves from head to toe in shiny paint and stand around for hours on end for the amusement of tourists. I was suitably amused, of course. We went to this lovely little cafe, where we sat listening to a string band, who accompanied their music with some odd little dance moves. It was nice. After that we went to a muffin shops that sold the most beautiful muffins I've ever seen. I got a blueberry muffin with a little man made of icing on the top. Vicky's had some sort of sweet on it. We were both pleased with our choices.

After lunch we visited David and Goliath <3 I love it there. It had swearing bears on the walls. Why doesn't everywhere have swearing bears? Then we wandered off and somehow ended up in China Town, where we were bombarded with every variety of noodle you can imagine. Aisles and aisles of noodles. So many noodles...

From there we managed to find our way to one of those square places (not entirely sure which one. There was some sort of giant lion? Feel free to google), where we were perved on by a very unsubtle old man. Like he literally just shuffled past, staring at us. With his eyes. HE DIDN'T EVEN LOOK AWAY WHEN WE LOOKED AT HIM. Not smooth.

Then we went to see Westminister (which is apparently some sort of church. Who knew) and Big Ben. I don't remember WHY we went there. We were going to do that on Saturday. But anyway, we went there and we stopped by Downing Street to compliment the men with the guns, crossed the big bridge and looked at the grey sludge that is the Thames. THEN we went for a little (I say little, but Vicky was clearly in pain by the end of it. I think she should have taken more sensible shoes) walk along Southbank. I like it there. It's lovely.

Got a bit lost at the end of Southbank and had to hunt down a tube station in an area that was clearly not meant for tourists. After finding said station, we went back to our beloved Oxford Street. BUT NO, Bloggies, WE DID NOT SHOP. No, we were in fact going to Oxford Street to find the hostel we were staying in. NEXT TO OXFORD STREET. Ah, shops. Despite the fact that I'd walked the way a million times on Google maps, we got a tad lost. It's not my fault. The roads are confusing. One minute it's Great Marlebourne, then it's Poland St! MAKE YOUR MIND UP ROAD.

Moving on. We eventually found our adorable little hostel and it was amazing. We were greeted by this pleasantly camp man. They had a cup of biros with feathers on the end. Everything was bright and colourful. They had a huge tube map on the wall. A lounge with big purple chairs. COFFEE. It was actually nicer than hotels that I've stayed in. Everyone should go there. EVERYONE. We hunted down our room. "Dorm 10". It was tense as we opened the door, wondering if we'd be sharing with STRANGERS. Thankfully the room was empty, although there were two sets of bunk beds. Vicky claimed the top of one. I said that was ok. I like being on the bottom ;)

Vicky put on her new flowery shorts that she'd bought, I took my tights off. WE WERE READY TO GO BACK OUT AND FACE LONDON. Admittedly it was getting fairly late, so we went to a few more shops (I don't remember which ones, but I'm sure they were amazing. HMV was one I think, where we both bought t-shirts with a picture of Charlie Sheen's face on) then wandered off the main road. That's when we found ourselves at a kind of private park with grass and flowers and swings and stuff. Vicky suggested as we left that it was probably for the rich kids who lived in the nice apartments opposite, but didn't have gardens. It seemed logical seeing as every child in the park had the same private school looking uniform on. We were probably trespassing. LOL.

We walked back towards our hostel, stopping off at a nice Italian restaurant (even though I hate Italian. Too many childhood memories of soggy calzone and cheesy risotto. No thanks) called Cafe Uno for tea. Then we went to Marks and Spencers which was virtually opposite our hostel (next door to a lovely Starbucks that will probably appear again in Vicky's post) and bought tights. BUT THESE ARE NOT JUST ANY TIGHTS. These are BROWN tights. They go with any outfit. They're lovely and soft. Not too thick, not too thin! They're good for cold summer evenings or those warm winter days! Marks and Spencer's brown tights: Perfect for all occasions! Get yours at any good M&S TODAY!

I hope you realise that the "BROWN tights" bit was meant to be read in that sexy M&S advert voice. You know, the one that makes a slice of chocolate cake in to some sort of porn film. Yeah. That one.

After the tights excitement, we went back to our hostel. It wasn't late enough for bed yet, so we went down to reception and got some drinks. I had the loveliest hot chocolate EVAR. Then we went and sat in the lounge, where we discussed life. While we were sat there, a Chinese man came and sat on the table next to ours with his tea. You'll never guess what he was eating. YEAH. NOODLES. Ah, amazing.

We went back to our room after that, put our pyjamas on and planned tomorrow. We drew each other lovely pictures of teddy bears and sang songs of Charlie Sheen. It was all very nice. Then we turned off the lights and settled down for a completely peaceful and entirely undisturbed sleep.

OR DID WE?!

Tune in next week (or whenever Vicky finishes her post) to find out!

I hope you had as much fun reading about our amazing London trip as I did going on it. LOL jk, you probably stopped reading about 10 paragraphs ago. If you did continue this far, 10 POINTS TO GRYFFINDOR!

Those crazy sheep are dancing for you. Enjoy it.

Jasm x

LONDON'S CALLING, BABY

Só, here we are in London. It's actually amazing. We're perched on stools, surrounded by the latest tech (eg the ipad2 that I'm writing this on) in the biggest apple store I've ever seen.

Literally huge.

Amazing.

Aah. AAAAH.

We've done lots of shopping. Spent numerous hours and days in topshop. It was beautiful.
We're at a loss for what to do now. Maybe some more shopping? Yeah, you're right. We should.

See you later, chums.

Vicky and Jasmine xxxxxx

Jolly good morning, Jeeves.

It's 7:05AM and today, bloggies, we go to LONDON.

IAMSOEXCITEDIT'SUNREAL.

ClickClickCluck
...

You looked, didn't you?

I'm telling.

Jasm x

The life of Timmy

So, it started when he was a child. By the age of one he was a fully fledged martial artist, with belts of all colours. By two he'd solved the inflation in Germany.

It all went downhill from there.

By knives I mean penises

I'm feeling in a very writey mood. Not in a coursework finishing kinda way. No, definitely not. More of a sociable, chit chat kinda way. So I am here, bloggies, to chit and chat.

Today was the start of Sixth Form Charity Week. This is something that I've watched take place for the past 6 years of my relatively dull school life. Basically, all of the sixth formers (I say all, but some people don't have the effort or motivation to bother) dress up in accordance with themes set for us by the head boy and girl throughout the week. Then we go around classrooms during our free periods and parade our potentially embarrassing attire in front of children, in the hope that they surrender their lunch money. Often they don't.

Despite this obvious drawback, Charity Week is something that most lower/upper school kids always look forward to taking part in. I myself used to wander around the corridors, trying to understand what on earth the guy in yellow tights was thinking when he slipped in to that banana suit in the morning, and mentally planning my own fancy dress costume for when I'd be in sixth form... in 4 years time. It was all very exciting.

Fast forward a couple of years and I can proudly say that we are no longer Charity Week virgins. Today's theme was "Fantasy and Fiction". It should've been easy to think of a character. I mean, we could've dressed up as just about anything and pretended it was from a book. In fact quite a few people did this. After switching between numerous ideas, I ended up donning an irritating red cloak thing (irritating because the hood kept slipping) and dressed up as Little Red Riding Hood. Then at lunch me, Tom/Lud and Harriet went to watch the teacher's X Factor in the hall. I hate to be cliché, but the less said about that the better. Let's just say there were numerous wigs and some fairly violent foot stamping.

Tomorrow is famous groups and duos day. Despite having the ready made group that is our "friendship group" (as Amy so brilliantly called it), none of us could think of a decent idea to incorporate all of us. Me and Vicky couldn't even think of a good duo. I know, SHOCKHORROR. Ancient history on Wednesday though, and I expect a flood of togas at school, poorly crafted from white sheets. I add my own to that list. Then "Things beginning with B" on Thursday. Me and Vicky are being a pair of butchers. IT'S FOR THE IRONY. We have fake blood. And foot long knives. Everyone will be jealous of our knives.

Then on Friday it's a Teacher Training Day and me and Vicky are going on our long awaited trip to London! But I shall discuss that closer to the date. Might even get Vicky to post.

You remember Vicky, right?

Jasm <3

So's your MUM'S face.

We posted once last month and yet somehow we managed to get 137 views.

I admire your dedication to our pathetic blog, guys <3

SO. I'm pretty sure a lot has happened. I can't think of anything in particular, but I'm sure it has.

...

OH I KNOW, I bought some new folders. YAY.

More interestingly than my trip to WHSmith, was mine and Vicky's birthdays, which took place late last month. It was fun. We had a birthday picnic. The weather wasn't co-operating. We played in the park and molested a panda while we were there. We went to Harriet's, where Matt was a sausage and DANNY NOWELL (I had to look on facebook to check I'd spelt his name right. I hadn't) was a bowl of rice. Me and Vicky had a sleepover and talked about boys and make up and kittens and other stereotypical feminine topics. 

It was all very jolly. Shame you couldn't come. OH WAIT, YOU WEREN'T INVITED.

Yeah. I went there.

Um. We're studying Language and Technology in English Language, and I'm now highly aware of what I'm typing. It's kinda unnerving. "Kinda" being both a hedge and an intensifier, both of which are generally associated with a female's vernacular. And "Um" being a filler, which reflects a sign of non-fluency in spontaneous spoken mode.

Speaking of English, have I mentioned that I have a piece of coursework to redraft for Tuesday?

Have I mentioned that I have a psychology mock to revise for?

HAVE I MENTIONED THAT I HAVE GOV+POL EXAM QUESTIONS TO ANSWER FOR TOMORROW?

No?

This post lacks cohesion and effort. My phone is buzzing at me. I need painkillers. Until next time, Bloggies <3

P.S. Happy ma's day, mummy.